Hello, "Blogee's!"

Still feeling crappy today. I dunno, seven more treatments to go. If they make me feel this crappy for this long, I'm not sure how I'll get through them. But I will keep plugging along. I am just so exhausted and headachy.

Yesterday I had four appointments: two blood draws and two doctor appointments. By the time I got to the last appointment (with the plastic surgeon), I was almost sound asleep on his exam table by the time he came in -- and he had NOT kept me waiting long at all. Anyway, at the plastic surgeon, I had another fill. These are very painful for me. As I have mentioned, I have a "tissue expander" implanted, which is regularly filled with saline until my tissue is expanded enough to eventually accept a regular implant. The more "cc's" they inject into the tissue expander through a port, the more uncomfortable for me (I had 45 cc's put in yesterday). So along with feeling the affects of the chemo, the discomfort and pain from the fill has only added to my punky feeling. I have to keep reminding myself how fortunate I am to be alive and not bellyache so much about how difficult and arduous a process this is.

I have a couple of days off now and the rest of the week will be fairly easy for me. I have only a blood draw on Thursday, and that's it for this week. Then next week, Tuesday, will be another fun chemo appointment, followed by the post-chemo shot on Wednesday.

Also, I did finally make an appointment for the "hair thing." Next Wednesday, after my post-chemo appointment, I'll be having my head shaved. Ugh. (Remember Deb: it's JUST HAIR. And it WILL grow back!)

Food cravings. I have had some of the strangest cravings. Larry, bless his heart, complies with each one. Some are not so strange, but some are. Let's see: there've been Hostess Twinkies (I just HAD to have a Hostess Twinkie. Larry bought a whole box, I ate one, and that was ENOUGH of that.) Boston Cooler. That was a pretty good one, except Larry brought home plain vanilla ice cream -- my craving said it had to be FRENCH vanilla. So we'll try that tonight and see if THAT hits the spot. Eggrolls. Go figure. But once again, Larry complied and they were m'mm, m'mm good! Chocolate. Not a particularly strange craving (especially for those of you who know me well!), but it couldn't be just ANY chocolate, it had to be Peppermint Patties, which I have never really liked before. And cucumbers! Yesterday, I was dying for a cucumber. Off Larry headed to Meijer for cucumbers, bless his heart. Then there've been the totally unexpected changes in my tastebuds. This evening, Larry had a jar of peanuts he was clawing into. I am not a nut person, and have never really had an especially strong affinity to peanuts. But man, were they good. Handful after handful, it seemed I couldn't get enough. If these cravings keep getting the better of me, the 20 pounds I've lost will come right back. Ugh.

Things here are different all the way around. My pitbull, Paisley, has become very protective of me. She's become like a shadow to me, and just wants to be with me ALL the time. It's as if she knows I am ill. She follows me everywhere, sleeps atop my feet (when I let her), and just doesn't let me out of her sight.

Sigh. I hope I will finally feel like getting out of bed tomorrow. Larry has rearranged the basement so that my three different sewing machines are in more workable locations. Hopefully I will feel up to putzing a bit down there sometime soon.

AND ... I will have baby Duke here with me tomorrow too. I won't be baby-sitting for him -- I'm just not quite up to that yet. So his daddy David will be caring for him and I'll just be sitting and enjoying my grandson. Little "Pookie-Duke" brings me so much joy. Hard to believe he's 18 months old already!

I have noted several new people following my blogs, having joined or left comments, or both. While I can't yet respond to each one of you, please know that I know you are there, you are praying, you are concerned, and you care. From my heart, I mean this, nothing touches me more or encourages me to keep going. Thank you so, so much, my friends.

Guess that's it for now. Back to "The Andy Griffith Show." I love the old sitcoms. They take me back to a time when I had no worries, they offer entertainment without my having to think, and they commit me to only a half hour at a time.

Think I'll go concoct that Boston Cooler now ...

God bless you all,
Deb