Hello all,

Feeling a little better this day. Nowhere near 100% as yet, but hoping I'll be in better shape soon. I spent Tuesday night in the emergency room again, due to lightheadedness, dizziness and nausea. With this having gone on for several days (since I was discharged from the hospital the last time), Larry finally convinced me to let him call the doctor. The doc recommended I head back to ER to be evaluated. Thankfully, they didn't admit me this time. As I suspected, they believe my Coumadin dosage is a bit too high for me. The dose has now been cut in half, I am still undergoing almost daily blood draws (on and out-patient basis), and hopefully soon, they will arrive at a dosage that's right for me. I will have to be on blood thinners now for at least 6 months, thanks to Mr. Blood Clot. If I have to face the next 6 months feeling as terrible as I have been feeling, and face the upcoming chemo on top of that, I don't know how I'll do it. Hopefully the Coumadin dosage can be successfully adjusted. Prayers, please!

Since the breast cancer diagnosis as well as the blood clot, I have had several doctors on the team to try to fix me back up again: a breast surgeon, an oncologist, a pulmonary specialist, and several doctors from each specialty. They all seemed to have differing opinions on things (i.e., whether I should have a mediport implanted to administer chemo; what my Coumadin dosage should be; whether drugs for anxiety should be increased -- hey, I wonder why I need anti-anxiety drugs?). So today, Larry took me to our family doctor, Dr. Bunney, so that he could sort it all out. Dr. Bunney agreed that my Coumadin dosage was probably out of whack, told me that my stress level was over-the-top high, and that my veins looked good enough that he felt that -- at least at this point -- I wouldn't yet need a mediport implanted, that I have had too much going on of late to face yet another surgery, especially with all the surgeries I will need to face in the future for the reconstructive process. So ...THANK YOU, DR. BUNNEY!

As I said, I am feeling a tiny bit better today, having cut my Coumadin dosage in half. Still have a headache, still pretty listless, still no appetite (I've lost nearly 15 pounds this month) and still pretty stressed about what's to come going forward. And unfortunately, I get the blues a LOT (yep, I am a total cry baby). But make no mistake, blues or no blues, my outlook remains positive, I remind myself all the time that my prognosis is good, and though I have a long road of treatment ahead (every bit of a full year), I am determined to come out of this as good as new, maybe even better. With a few new parts and a brand-new head of hair that will come back in after chemo, I might just be a new and improved me!

To those of you to whom breast cancer has hit close to home, whether it be you, or your loved one, I especially thank you for your encouragement and sincerity of good wishes. You know who you are, and I do too -- I don't forget. And your support for me is extra special. Thank you.

For the comments I see here on my blog from so many, thank you also. I am so touched by each one, and I read them over and over. They keep me going. Many, many thanks.

To my devoted husband, Larry, who continues to wait on me hand and foot, manage all my doctor appointments, drive me to and from all of them and stay by my side during each appointment and procedure, I am forever grateful, and thank God each day for the blessings He gave me in sending me such a wonderful spouse. For Larry's management of all the hospital bills that have begun to arrive, and the ensuing interaction with the insurance company, I am so grateful. I could not do this without him. I have too many blessings to count!

Most importantly, my most humble thanks to the Lord Jesus Christ, who has seen fit to spare my life not once, but TWICE this month alone. THANK YOU, LORD! And thank you too, for the freedom to still choose our health plan, so that I could have the best and most skilled care available, without delay.

Love and God Bless,
Deb