Hello family and friends,

Well, today was a pretty good day. It was the first day I drove all by myself since my ordeal began. Kinda hard backing up the car, when I have to put my right arm on the passenger seat and twist my body backward. But I made it. I actually went to Joann Fabrics, bought myself some fleece (in a breast cancer, pink ribbon print) and actually made -- and completed -- a blanket/quilt. It was difficult using my right arm at the sewing machine, but I got through it. They say the chemo lab is chilly, so I am trying to get prepared by having a special blanket ready to use. (Although, how does one really prepare for a journey like this one?) Anyway, I found a breast cancer fleece print with different breast cancer-motif squares. I bought a solid pink fleece to back it with, then machine sewed the two layers together, sewing around each square. Then jumped over to my serger and serged all around the edges. Very simple, and very cuddly. Kind of a security blanket. Right now I'll take all the security I can get; I am so nervous and so scared.

I was apprehensive not only to drive by myself, but to BE by myself. Larry worked today (he drives a bus part time for Oakand County), and was gone all day for the first time since my surgery. So I got brave. By the time I got home, then worked on the blanket though, I was exhausted. So here I sit, trying to relax and update my blog.

My sister Brenda keeps advising me to find "satisfying distractions." Good advice! So that is what I tried to do by making this blanket today. It really did help take my mind off of things a little. Thanks, Bren! I may have overdone a bit though; I'm pretty tired now. And I am VERY nervous about starting chemo. How ill will I be? Will I be courageous enough to get through all eight treatments without becoming dibilitatingly ill? Will my veins hold up? (I sure hope so ... I do NOT want that port!)

Larry continues to be my Rock of Gibralter. He has been so good to me and takes SUCH good care of me. He is quite a man, and has really shown what he's made of with this situation.

The pain is getting more manageable now, other than the painful arm exercises I have to keep doing to strengthen my right arm and stretch those muscles. Once in awhile, I get a stabbing pain in the back of my upper arm, and/or my armpit, which I believe to be from the lymph node removal. I also still have a huge bruise covering the entire surgical area. I wish that would go away; it only makes things look even worse than they already are. :(

I continue to count my many blessings every single day. All the cards, emails, blog comments, calls and overall concern have touched me beyond measure. And I KNOW that these are the things giving me strength to face what's ahead. Support is vital and so appreciated. But when it comes right down to it, no one can take this journey for me -- I must do it by myself. So I humbly thank all of you for being there to cheer me on, to uplift me, and give me strength and encouragement. I don't know how I would make it through without all of you.

I am pooping out, so I will say goodnight for now. Thank you everyone, for reading my blogs and being interested and concerned enough to do so.

God's blessings to you all,
Deb