Hello, "Blogee's!"
Still feeling crappy today. I dunno, seven more treatments to go. If they make me feel this crappy for this long, I'm not sure how I'll get through them. But I will keep plugging along. I am just so exhausted and headachy.
Yesterday I had four appointments: two blood draws and two doctor appointments. By the time I got to the last appointment (with the plastic surgeon), I was almost sound asleep on his exam table by the time he came in -- and he had NOT kept me waiting long at all. Anyway, at the plastic surgeon, I had another fill. These are very painful for me. As I have mentioned, I have a "tissue expander" implanted, which is regularly filled with saline until my tissue is expanded enough to eventually accept a regular implant. The more "cc's" they inject into the tissue expander through a port, the more uncomfortable for me (I had 45 cc's put in yesterday). So along with feeling the affects of the chemo, the discomfort and pain from the fill has only added to my punky feeling. I have to keep reminding myself how fortunate I am to be alive and not bellyache so much about how difficult and arduous a process this is.
I have a couple of days off now and the rest of the week will be fairly easy for me. I have only a blood draw on Thursday, and that's it for this week. Then next week, Tuesday, will be another fun chemo appointment, followed by the post-chemo shot on Wednesday.
Also, I did finally make an appointment for the "hair thing." Next Wednesday, after my post-chemo appointment, I'll be having my head shaved. Ugh. (Remember Deb: it's JUST HAIR. And it WILL grow back!)
Food cravings. I have had some of the strangest cravings. Larry, bless his heart, complies with each one. Some are not so strange, but some are. Let's see: there've been Hostess Twinkies (I just HAD to have a Hostess Twinkie. Larry bought a whole box, I ate one, and that was ENOUGH of that.) Boston Cooler. That was a pretty good one, except Larry brought home plain vanilla ice cream -- my craving said it had to be FRENCH vanilla. So we'll try that tonight and see if THAT hits the spot. Eggrolls. Go figure. But once again, Larry complied and they were m'mm, m'mm good! Chocolate. Not a particularly strange craving (especially for those of you who know me well!), but it couldn't be just ANY chocolate, it had to be Peppermint Patties, which I have never really liked before. And cucumbers! Yesterday, I was dying for a cucumber. Off Larry headed to Meijer for cucumbers, bless his heart. Then there've been the totally unexpected changes in my tastebuds. This evening, Larry had a jar of peanuts he was clawing into. I am not a nut person, and have never really had an especially strong affinity to peanuts. But man, were they good. Handful after handful, it seemed I couldn't get enough. If these cravings keep getting the better of me, the 20 pounds I've lost will come right back. Ugh.
Things here are different all the way around. My pitbull, Paisley, has become very protective of me. She's become like a shadow to me, and just wants to be with me ALL the time. It's as if she knows I am ill. She follows me everywhere, sleeps atop my feet (when I let her), and just doesn't let me out of her sight.
Sigh. I hope I will finally feel like getting out of bed tomorrow. Larry has rearranged the basement so that my three different sewing machines are in more workable locations. Hopefully I will feel up to putzing a bit down there sometime soon.
AND ... I will have baby Duke here with me tomorrow too. I won't be baby-sitting for him -- I'm just not quite up to that yet. So his daddy David will be caring for him and I'll just be sitting and enjoying my grandson. Little "Pookie-Duke" brings me so much joy. Hard to believe he's 18 months old already!
I have noted several new people following my blogs, having joined or left comments, or both. While I can't yet respond to each one of you, please know that I know you are there, you are praying, you are concerned, and you care. From my heart, I mean this, nothing touches me more or encourages me to keep going. Thank you so, so much, my friends.
Guess that's it for now. Back to "The Andy Griffith Show." I love the old sitcoms. They take me back to a time when I had no worries, they offer entertainment without my having to think, and they commit me to only a half hour at a time.
Think I'll go concoct that Boston Cooler now ...
God bless you all,
Deb
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Another day, another nauseated day. Bah. I guess this is part of chemo, though I thought it would have passed by now. Is every day going to feel "ick" like this? Ugh. How I dread it if it does.
Mark came home from CMU for the weekend. So nice to have him home. His girlfriend Sarah came over and we had lasagna, though it wasn't "mom's homemade lasagna," it was Stouffer's. But it did the job and it was so nice to visit with them, even though I wasn't a very good host (I lay on the couch most of the time they were here).
The anti-nausea meds don't seem to do the trick -- or maybe they do; maybe I'd feel even worse without them.
Two doctor appointments tomorrow. Larry continues to do a phenomenal job managing everything! My many appointments, my many meds and the times at which to take them, honestly, it is a full-time job that I would not be able to do alone. This is something neither of us signed on for, but then, no one ever does. I am just so blessed that he's in this with me for the long haul. What would I do without him?
Take care everyone. I am going (back) to bed.
Deb
Mark came home from CMU for the weekend. So nice to have him home. His girlfriend Sarah came over and we had lasagna, though it wasn't "mom's homemade lasagna," it was Stouffer's. But it did the job and it was so nice to visit with them, even though I wasn't a very good host (I lay on the couch most of the time they were here).
The anti-nausea meds don't seem to do the trick -- or maybe they do; maybe I'd feel even worse without them.
Two doctor appointments tomorrow. Larry continues to do a phenomenal job managing everything! My many appointments, my many meds and the times at which to take them, honestly, it is a full-time job that I would not be able to do alone. This is something neither of us signed on for, but then, no one ever does. I am just so blessed that he's in this with me for the long haul. What would I do without him?
Take care everyone. I am going (back) to bed.
Deb
Saturday, September 26, 2009
It's been awhile! And for many reasons.
First of all, as I mentioned, our internet was on again/off again for a few days, so that prevented me from new postings.
Then .... chemo, and BLAH. It caught up to me, and I had a hard time getting out of bed for more than a couple of days.
My first treatment was last Tuesday, and it went well. I had the luxury of having both my husband Larry AND my sister Brenda with me for that first round. I was so apprehensive, it was nice to have their support. A couple of years ago, my sister was taking part in a fund-raiser for breast cancer research, and was making gorgeous pink pearl bracelets with a breast cancer ribbon/charm attached to each. They were so lovely, I bought one for the cause. Little did I know that I would one day be a part of that cause a couple of years down the line ............. Anyway, I loved that bracelet so much that I wore it all the time. Somehow, I broke it, and thankfully didn't lose it. That bracelet means so much to me, not only because my sister made it, but now because of its added significance. Bren repaired the bracelet for me, and gave it back to me on the day of my first chemo treatment. It is so sentimental and special to me. Thank you, Bren.
The treatment went okay, and I actually didn't feel too bad afterward. It consisted of several different IV bags, which they kept changing. Then, the "big guns" came out: two very large, and I do mean LARGE syringes filled with red liquid. I gulped. These syringes were similar to ones I'd seen used on Animal Planet to tranquilize hippo's. Honest. I asked if they were going to inject those syringes straight into me; thankfully, no, they were going to inject the red liquid into my IV. Whew!
Anyway, I made it through Tuesday just fine, with no appreciable nausea. Wednesday I went back for "the shot." I don't remember the name of it, but it is given to keep my white blood cell count up and prevent infection. Now that shot HURTS. It is known for making your long bones hurt the next day, like your calf, thigh, arm, back and sternum bones. And it did what it's known for. By Thursday, not only was I totally nauseated from the chemo, but every bone in my body ached. I did take the prescribed anti-nausea drugs, which helped (well, I didn't throw up, anyway), but I was still pretty nauseated both Thursday and Friday. Today is Saturday, and though not quite as nauseated, I am still pretty wiped out and don't feel like doing much.
My hair is still attached to my scalp, but will all be gone soon (I know, I keep saying that, don't I ...). I can't control much about this illness, but what I CAN control is when my hair will be gone. I intend to have it shaved before I begin to find huge clumps of it everywhere, yet ... I can't seem to make the appointment to do so. Hey, how 'bout this: I read online someplace that some insurance companies will pay for the wig, as long as it's not called a "wig," but rather, a "cranial prosthesis." How do you like THAT one? A cranial prosthesis. My oncologist was kind enough to write the prescription, but alas, no dice with the insurance company. They're totally onto that cranial prosthesis thing, and gave us a quick thumbs down. Nice try though.
The large bruise covering the whole surgical area seems to FINALLY be resolving. THANK GOODNESS. I was beginning to worry about that, but you know me and how I obsess. I am due to go back into the plastic surgeon on Monday for another fill of the tissue expander, and he will have a look then to make sure everything's okay. He wants all my fills to be complete by the time my chemo is complete. Ugh. I believe they plan on doing about 8 fills total, give or take a couple. Not looking forward to those fills; they are very uncomfortable; painful, actually. I wonder if I will EVER feel normal again. I am beginning to have my doubts and get discouraged.
I work daily on my wall-walking exercises though, and am getting a little better use of my right arm now. I have a long way to go -- it's still pretty siezed up. But at least I can lift it over my head, if my elbow is bent a bit. As I said, the exercises are difficult and painful. But necessary, as is anything worthwhile.
The clot in my lung is still there -- I feel a bit of a flutter when I breathe. But my blood levels are where they should be, thanks to the Coumadin (blood thinners), so I think, and hope, that the clot is dissolving.
And guess what. I have lost 20 pounds now since this ordeal began. Trust me though, this was NOT the way to do it.
I will sign off for now. Time once again for the Gaither Gospel Hour on RFD TV Network, and I can't miss that! Nothing uplifts me and encourages me more than Southern Gospel Music.
Take good care, everyone. Remember too, that every single day is a blessing. And every single HEALTHY day is even MORE of a blessing. Don't take anything for granted.
Blessings to all, and thank you for your love and support. I won't ever stop needing it, nor will I ever stop appreciating it.
Deb
PS: I note that the time indicated that I post my blogs is ALWAYS WRONG. I have no idea why, but for what it's worth, this particular post was completed at 7 p.m. Saturday. Go figger.
First of all, as I mentioned, our internet was on again/off again for a few days, so that prevented me from new postings.
Then .... chemo, and BLAH. It caught up to me, and I had a hard time getting out of bed for more than a couple of days.
My first treatment was last Tuesday, and it went well. I had the luxury of having both my husband Larry AND my sister Brenda with me for that first round. I was so apprehensive, it was nice to have their support. A couple of years ago, my sister was taking part in a fund-raiser for breast cancer research, and was making gorgeous pink pearl bracelets with a breast cancer ribbon/charm attached to each. They were so lovely, I bought one for the cause. Little did I know that I would one day be a part of that cause a couple of years down the line ............. Anyway, I loved that bracelet so much that I wore it all the time. Somehow, I broke it, and thankfully didn't lose it. That bracelet means so much to me, not only because my sister made it, but now because of its added significance. Bren repaired the bracelet for me, and gave it back to me on the day of my first chemo treatment. It is so sentimental and special to me. Thank you, Bren.
The treatment went okay, and I actually didn't feel too bad afterward. It consisted of several different IV bags, which they kept changing. Then, the "big guns" came out: two very large, and I do mean LARGE syringes filled with red liquid. I gulped. These syringes were similar to ones I'd seen used on Animal Planet to tranquilize hippo's. Honest. I asked if they were going to inject those syringes straight into me; thankfully, no, they were going to inject the red liquid into my IV. Whew!
Anyway, I made it through Tuesday just fine, with no appreciable nausea. Wednesday I went back for "the shot." I don't remember the name of it, but it is given to keep my white blood cell count up and prevent infection. Now that shot HURTS. It is known for making your long bones hurt the next day, like your calf, thigh, arm, back and sternum bones. And it did what it's known for. By Thursday, not only was I totally nauseated from the chemo, but every bone in my body ached. I did take the prescribed anti-nausea drugs, which helped (well, I didn't throw up, anyway), but I was still pretty nauseated both Thursday and Friday. Today is Saturday, and though not quite as nauseated, I am still pretty wiped out and don't feel like doing much.
My hair is still attached to my scalp, but will all be gone soon (I know, I keep saying that, don't I ...). I can't control much about this illness, but what I CAN control is when my hair will be gone. I intend to have it shaved before I begin to find huge clumps of it everywhere, yet ... I can't seem to make the appointment to do so. Hey, how 'bout this: I read online someplace that some insurance companies will pay for the wig, as long as it's not called a "wig," but rather, a "cranial prosthesis." How do you like THAT one? A cranial prosthesis. My oncologist was kind enough to write the prescription, but alas, no dice with the insurance company. They're totally onto that cranial prosthesis thing, and gave us a quick thumbs down. Nice try though.
The large bruise covering the whole surgical area seems to FINALLY be resolving. THANK GOODNESS. I was beginning to worry about that, but you know me and how I obsess. I am due to go back into the plastic surgeon on Monday for another fill of the tissue expander, and he will have a look then to make sure everything's okay. He wants all my fills to be complete by the time my chemo is complete. Ugh. I believe they plan on doing about 8 fills total, give or take a couple. Not looking forward to those fills; they are very uncomfortable; painful, actually. I wonder if I will EVER feel normal again. I am beginning to have my doubts and get discouraged.
I work daily on my wall-walking exercises though, and am getting a little better use of my right arm now. I have a long way to go -- it's still pretty siezed up. But at least I can lift it over my head, if my elbow is bent a bit. As I said, the exercises are difficult and painful. But necessary, as is anything worthwhile.
The clot in my lung is still there -- I feel a bit of a flutter when I breathe. But my blood levels are where they should be, thanks to the Coumadin (blood thinners), so I think, and hope, that the clot is dissolving.
And guess what. I have lost 20 pounds now since this ordeal began. Trust me though, this was NOT the way to do it.
I will sign off for now. Time once again for the Gaither Gospel Hour on RFD TV Network, and I can't miss that! Nothing uplifts me and encourages me more than Southern Gospel Music.
Take good care, everyone. Remember too, that every single day is a blessing. And every single HEALTHY day is even MORE of a blessing. Don't take anything for granted.
Blessings to all, and thank you for your love and support. I won't ever stop needing it, nor will I ever stop appreciating it.
Deb
PS: I note that the time indicated that I post my blogs is ALWAYS WRONG. I have no idea why, but for what it's worth, this particular post was completed at 7 p.m. Saturday. Go figger.
Monday, September 21, 2009
Well, our internet is on the fritz. It's been coming and going for 2 days now. I feel like I am cut off from the world without the internet. Service person is coming out here Wednesday to try to fix it. Dang.
Chemo starts tomorrow, and I am a nervous wreck. Plus, other stresses here at home are adding to my high anxiety level. 'Nuff said on that.
Anyway, please pray for me. I am so dreading this chemo. I don't know why, because this is what is going to HELP me keep anymore cancer AWAY. I am not particularly fearful of IV's, so I am really not sure why I am so scared. Maybe the hair loss, maybe the nausea. I do hope I will continue to have your prayers as I enter this phase of my treatment. Thank you.
If our internet is in an "on-again" state, I'll let you know on tomorrow's blog how the first chemo went.
Blessings,
Deb
Chemo starts tomorrow, and I am a nervous wreck. Plus, other stresses here at home are adding to my high anxiety level. 'Nuff said on that.
Anyway, please pray for me. I am so dreading this chemo. I don't know why, because this is what is going to HELP me keep anymore cancer AWAY. I am not particularly fearful of IV's, so I am really not sure why I am so scared. Maybe the hair loss, maybe the nausea. I do hope I will continue to have your prayers as I enter this phase of my treatment. Thank you.
If our internet is in an "on-again" state, I'll let you know on tomorrow's blog how the first chemo went.
Blessings,
Deb
Saturday, September 19, 2009
Wow, just when I thought I was starting to feel prettty good, today I feel crummy again. I got out and about for the first time by myself yesterday, drove for the first time, and maybe I over-did a bit. I am having quite a bit of pain today, whereas before, it had nearly subsided. Rats. Earlier today, I was putting together some small gift bags for three specific people on the Troy Beumont staff who really touched me, really helped me through. By the time I ran upstairs a couple of times for scissors and tape (home office is up there), then to the basement a few times for wrapping paper and ribbon, I think I wore myself out. Now I am back to headaches and surgical pain. It's deceiving, because when I think I feel well enough to do things, I forget that I still need to take it pretty easy. This darn tissue expander is so uncomfortable too. Although the area is numb, I still feel the edges of the tissue expander, especially reaching up under my arm. So uncomfortable. And there for several months to come. Ugh.
I hope I start feeling better before I start chemo on Tuesday. The way I feel now, I am not sure I am strong enough to throw chemo on top of already feeling so lousy. Darn it.
Then there's the worry over whether this lousy feeling is normal. Is it normal to feel crummy 6 weeks post-op? Still drained of energy, and still in a good bit of pain? I am on so many darn meds too, that I hated to throw Tylenol in on top of it. But I did, and it did no good anyway. I have been off the Vicadin for quite some time now, so I hate to go back to that again ... gosh, this recuperation, as well as the stress of the unknown ahead is proving to be quite a challenge.
I also note that a few of my breast cancer survivor sisters underwent chemo for a lot less time than I am slated for. Most of them were 4 to 6 treatments, whereas I am prescribed 8. You know me, this makes me obsess too, wondering why I have to have so many extra treatments.
I bought a couple of pink terry cloth turbans yesterday while I was out and about. I got them at Bed, Bath and Beyond, in their "Breast Cancer Awareness" section, trying to prepare for the head of hair that will soon be all gone. And I will picking up my wig soon, too. Sigh. I am hoping that once I get into the chemo routine, my stress will subside somewhat. I know I will feel ill -- they've already told me that -- but if I could be ill without the stress of the unknown, it would sure help.
The "guilties" are starting to get to me too. I feel terrible just sitting while Larry buzzes all around me cleaning and grocery shopping. Larry is out this evening for a little bit, helping his son with a car issue. So for now, it's just me and the pups. It is amazing how much comfort and companionship my dogs offer, especially the big, 70-pound pitbull. She's like having another person sitting next to me, so warm, cuddly and calming.
Guess that's it for today. Feeling pretty blah, so I'll sign off for now. Cards, emails and prayers continue to pour in. All are such a welcome comfort to me; I never get tired of hearing from so many. Thank you. How I wish I could reply to each individually, but I am blessed to have so many good wishes coming my way, that it's impossible to respond to each, at least right now. So the blogs will have to continue to suffice. Thanks to all for understanding.
God bless,
Deb
I hope I start feeling better before I start chemo on Tuesday. The way I feel now, I am not sure I am strong enough to throw chemo on top of already feeling so lousy. Darn it.
Then there's the worry over whether this lousy feeling is normal. Is it normal to feel crummy 6 weeks post-op? Still drained of energy, and still in a good bit of pain? I am on so many darn meds too, that I hated to throw Tylenol in on top of it. But I did, and it did no good anyway. I have been off the Vicadin for quite some time now, so I hate to go back to that again ... gosh, this recuperation, as well as the stress of the unknown ahead is proving to be quite a challenge.
I also note that a few of my breast cancer survivor sisters underwent chemo for a lot less time than I am slated for. Most of them were 4 to 6 treatments, whereas I am prescribed 8. You know me, this makes me obsess too, wondering why I have to have so many extra treatments.
I bought a couple of pink terry cloth turbans yesterday while I was out and about. I got them at Bed, Bath and Beyond, in their "Breast Cancer Awareness" section, trying to prepare for the head of hair that will soon be all gone. And I will picking up my wig soon, too. Sigh. I am hoping that once I get into the chemo routine, my stress will subside somewhat. I know I will feel ill -- they've already told me that -- but if I could be ill without the stress of the unknown, it would sure help.
The "guilties" are starting to get to me too. I feel terrible just sitting while Larry buzzes all around me cleaning and grocery shopping. Larry is out this evening for a little bit, helping his son with a car issue. So for now, it's just me and the pups. It is amazing how much comfort and companionship my dogs offer, especially the big, 70-pound pitbull. She's like having another person sitting next to me, so warm, cuddly and calming.
Guess that's it for today. Feeling pretty blah, so I'll sign off for now. Cards, emails and prayers continue to pour in. All are such a welcome comfort to me; I never get tired of hearing from so many. Thank you. How I wish I could reply to each individually, but I am blessed to have so many good wishes coming my way, that it's impossible to respond to each, at least right now. So the blogs will have to continue to suffice. Thanks to all for understanding.
God bless,
Deb
Friday, September 18, 2009
Hello family and friends,
Well, today was a pretty good day. It was the first day I drove all by myself since my ordeal began. Kinda hard backing up the car, when I have to put my right arm on the passenger seat and twist my body backward. But I made it. I actually went to Joann Fabrics, bought myself some fleece (in a breast cancer, pink ribbon print) and actually made -- and completed -- a blanket/quilt. It was difficult using my right arm at the sewing machine, but I got through it. They say the chemo lab is chilly, so I am trying to get prepared by having a special blanket ready to use. (Although, how does one really prepare for a journey like this one?) Anyway, I found a breast cancer fleece print with different breast cancer-motif squares. I bought a solid pink fleece to back it with, then machine sewed the two layers together, sewing around each square. Then jumped over to my serger and serged all around the edges. Very simple, and very cuddly. Kind of a security blanket. Right now I'll take all the security I can get; I am so nervous and so scared.
I was apprehensive not only to drive by myself, but to BE by myself. Larry worked today (he drives a bus part time for Oakand County), and was gone all day for the first time since my surgery. So I got brave. By the time I got home, then worked on the blanket though, I was exhausted. So here I sit, trying to relax and update my blog.
My sister Brenda keeps advising me to find "satisfying distractions." Good advice! So that is what I tried to do by making this blanket today. It really did help take my mind off of things a little. Thanks, Bren! I may have overdone a bit though; I'm pretty tired now. And I am VERY nervous about starting chemo. How ill will I be? Will I be courageous enough to get through all eight treatments without becoming dibilitatingly ill? Will my veins hold up? (I sure hope so ... I do NOT want that port!)
Larry continues to be my Rock of Gibralter. He has been so good to me and takes SUCH good care of me. He is quite a man, and has really shown what he's made of with this situation.
The pain is getting more manageable now, other than the painful arm exercises I have to keep doing to strengthen my right arm and stretch those muscles. Once in awhile, I get a stabbing pain in the back of my upper arm, and/or my armpit, which I believe to be from the lymph node removal. I also still have a huge bruise covering the entire surgical area. I wish that would go away; it only makes things look even worse than they already are. :(
I continue to count my many blessings every single day. All the cards, emails, blog comments, calls and overall concern have touched me beyond measure. And I KNOW that these are the things giving me strength to face what's ahead. Support is vital and so appreciated. But when it comes right down to it, no one can take this journey for me -- I must do it by myself. So I humbly thank all of you for being there to cheer me on, to uplift me, and give me strength and encouragement. I don't know how I would make it through without all of you.
I am pooping out, so I will say goodnight for now. Thank you everyone, for reading my blogs and being interested and concerned enough to do so.
God's blessings to you all,
Deb
Well, today was a pretty good day. It was the first day I drove all by myself since my ordeal began. Kinda hard backing up the car, when I have to put my right arm on the passenger seat and twist my body backward. But I made it. I actually went to Joann Fabrics, bought myself some fleece (in a breast cancer, pink ribbon print) and actually made -- and completed -- a blanket/quilt. It was difficult using my right arm at the sewing machine, but I got through it. They say the chemo lab is chilly, so I am trying to get prepared by having a special blanket ready to use. (Although, how does one really prepare for a journey like this one?) Anyway, I found a breast cancer fleece print with different breast cancer-motif squares. I bought a solid pink fleece to back it with, then machine sewed the two layers together, sewing around each square. Then jumped over to my serger and serged all around the edges. Very simple, and very cuddly. Kind of a security blanket. Right now I'll take all the security I can get; I am so nervous and so scared.
I was apprehensive not only to drive by myself, but to BE by myself. Larry worked today (he drives a bus part time for Oakand County), and was gone all day for the first time since my surgery. So I got brave. By the time I got home, then worked on the blanket though, I was exhausted. So here I sit, trying to relax and update my blog.
My sister Brenda keeps advising me to find "satisfying distractions." Good advice! So that is what I tried to do by making this blanket today. It really did help take my mind off of things a little. Thanks, Bren! I may have overdone a bit though; I'm pretty tired now. And I am VERY nervous about starting chemo. How ill will I be? Will I be courageous enough to get through all eight treatments without becoming dibilitatingly ill? Will my veins hold up? (I sure hope so ... I do NOT want that port!)
Larry continues to be my Rock of Gibralter. He has been so good to me and takes SUCH good care of me. He is quite a man, and has really shown what he's made of with this situation.
The pain is getting more manageable now, other than the painful arm exercises I have to keep doing to strengthen my right arm and stretch those muscles. Once in awhile, I get a stabbing pain in the back of my upper arm, and/or my armpit, which I believe to be from the lymph node removal. I also still have a huge bruise covering the entire surgical area. I wish that would go away; it only makes things look even worse than they already are. :(
I continue to count my many blessings every single day. All the cards, emails, blog comments, calls and overall concern have touched me beyond measure. And I KNOW that these are the things giving me strength to face what's ahead. Support is vital and so appreciated. But when it comes right down to it, no one can take this journey for me -- I must do it by myself. So I humbly thank all of you for being there to cheer me on, to uplift me, and give me strength and encouragement. I don't know how I would make it through without all of you.
I am pooping out, so I will say goodnight for now. Thank you everyone, for reading my blogs and being interested and concerned enough to do so.
God's blessings to you all,
Deb
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Hello for today,
We just got home from a "chemo class," in preparation for my chemo treatments that begin on Tuesday. It will be a very demanding 4 months. Not only will we have to make the trip to Troy Beaumont for a chemo treatment every other Tuesday, but we will also have to see the doctor the day before chemo, and return to the chemo clinic the day after chemo for a shot to keep my white blood cell count up. So it's THREE trips to Beaumont Hospital every other week instead of just one. And now I am REALLY SORRY we no longer live a stone's throw away there in nearby Rochester. Living way out here in Ortonville, it's nearly a 30-mile trip one way to the hospital. What a drag.
Then there'll be the other doctor visits in between, to the plastic surgeon -- those are also every other week, and just as far away from home.
We also learned today about all the specific negative side affects of the chemo. I won't go into all of them here, but it sure doesn't sound like much fun. Thousands of women go through this same regimine each year, however. I am not the first, and unfortunately I won't be the last. They've all made it through, and so will I, even though I am sure not looking forward to it. Larry vows to drive me to each treatment, and sit through each of them with me. I am so fortunate. Like so many other spouses who are primary caregivers to their wives through this God-awful disease, Larry deserves a medal. There is a lot more to this than meets the eye.
The lady who conducted our one-on-one chemo class today, Veronica, is a recent breast cancer survivor herself. In fact, she just finished the last of her treatements (both chemo and radiation) in May. Her hair is just now beginning to come in. She was a great inspiration to me, and was able to offer a firsthand view of what I can expect. In addition, her husband is the head of oncology of the Royal Oak Beaumont facility. So she had the advantage of living with her oncologist, who could give her extra tips on how to get through the rigerous treatments, which she passed along to me. She was a great comfort, and as I said, such an inspiration.
And OH MAN, these arm exercises are extremely painful! I am not doing so well with them and should be further along. I keep trying to "walk the walls" as the exercises dictate, but I sure can't get very far up that wall yet. It just hurts ... a LOT. But I can't give up -- I do NOT want to lose full use of my right arm!
So that's it for today. I always appreciate knowing someone out there is reading these blogs. You are all my support team, and from all of you, I draw such strength. Thank you.
We just got home from a "chemo class," in preparation for my chemo treatments that begin on Tuesday. It will be a very demanding 4 months. Not only will we have to make the trip to Troy Beaumont for a chemo treatment every other Tuesday, but we will also have to see the doctor the day before chemo, and return to the chemo clinic the day after chemo for a shot to keep my white blood cell count up. So it's THREE trips to Beaumont Hospital every other week instead of just one. And now I am REALLY SORRY we no longer live a stone's throw away there in nearby Rochester. Living way out here in Ortonville, it's nearly a 30-mile trip one way to the hospital. What a drag.
Then there'll be the other doctor visits in between, to the plastic surgeon -- those are also every other week, and just as far away from home.
We also learned today about all the specific negative side affects of the chemo. I won't go into all of them here, but it sure doesn't sound like much fun. Thousands of women go through this same regimine each year, however. I am not the first, and unfortunately I won't be the last. They've all made it through, and so will I, even though I am sure not looking forward to it. Larry vows to drive me to each treatment, and sit through each of them with me. I am so fortunate. Like so many other spouses who are primary caregivers to their wives through this God-awful disease, Larry deserves a medal. There is a lot more to this than meets the eye.
The lady who conducted our one-on-one chemo class today, Veronica, is a recent breast cancer survivor herself. In fact, she just finished the last of her treatements (both chemo and radiation) in May. Her hair is just now beginning to come in. She was a great inspiration to me, and was able to offer a firsthand view of what I can expect. In addition, her husband is the head of oncology of the Royal Oak Beaumont facility. So she had the advantage of living with her oncologist, who could give her extra tips on how to get through the rigerous treatments, which she passed along to me. She was a great comfort, and as I said, such an inspiration.
And OH MAN, these arm exercises are extremely painful! I am not doing so well with them and should be further along. I keep trying to "walk the walls" as the exercises dictate, but I sure can't get very far up that wall yet. It just hurts ... a LOT. But I can't give up -- I do NOT want to lose full use of my right arm!
So that's it for today. I always appreciate knowing someone out there is reading these blogs. You are all my support team, and from all of you, I draw such strength. Thank you.
Love to all,
Deb
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